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| I want to say I'm a girl with high morals, but I can't
i've made a lot of wrong choices, did a lot of mistakes..
I want to say I'm a girl true to her words, but I can't
i tend to change my mind a lot, my words are sometimes the right thing to do, but it's hard to follow through
I want to say I'm a girl that knows how to have fun, but I can't
i can't always think of fun stuff to do, because sometimes just being with that guy sitting around is okay with me
I want to say I'm a girl that will not get jealous, but I can't
i want to believe that i won't be jealous if i see my man with another girl, but it's impossible, i'll just stay quiet
I want to say I'm a girl that will always be there, but I can't
it frustrates me when i can't feel what he feels, i want to be able to stand in his shoes, but it's nearly impossible
I want to say I'm a girl that will be understanding, but I can't
i don't even understand why this world functions the way it does
I want to say I'm a girl that is independent, but I can't
i love to see my bf every second if i could, there are only so many seconds in a day...><
I want to say I'm a girl that will be everything a guy wants, but I can't
i am still learning from left to right, up and down, right and wrong, good and bad
I WANT TO BE ALL THESE THINGS I CAN'T =(( BUT...
One thing I can say is that I'm a girl that learns each and everyday to become the girl perfect for the guy who will look pass the high morals, her words, the excitement, the jealousy, and see the heart that lies in her body
BECAUSE if I'm not that perfect girl I might not be ready for that guy and he might just slip out of my life =))
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| When mister right becomes mister wrong
Makes me wonder if I ever was as strong
Ever as strong as I thought I could be
I'm becoming the girl I don't want to be
All annoying, clingy, and needy
Tried to avoid all the things that could set him free
Ignored all the bad things that I could see
But now I'm back to where I should be
Looking back, it's hard to tell what was really sincere
Was everything just a piece of a broken mirror
I figured the shattered glass is not ready to be mend
Into something strong, worthwhile, genuine, pure, adored
I had so much to say
But honestly everything's become gray
Lost with my thoughts
Everything came too quick
All that's left is an illusion
I know he's worth more than what he pictures himself as
Letting go of the past is hard
After all, it's what made you who you are today
But learn from the past to become better
Better for yourself and not for someone else
You might think you're not important, and you can't make a difference
But you could mean the world to one person and not know it
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| Over the weekend, my family came to Cali for my Grandma's 78th birthday and also to celebrate Chinese New Year's. It feels so nice to have them around, it's like a never ending party. We blast our music and sing, careless about how crappy we sound. We pull our baby cousins to join the fun, and they look at us funky but they still sing because they know we're the coolest and the bestest cousins :) We get kicked out of our house because we're making too much noise, so we run over to Grandma's house and we take over the house. We play Killer, our winking game, and we end up starving so we quickly drive to get 5 dollar pizzas. By the end of the night Chris takes the important half of us to get yogurt and he ends up staying at mi casa, but changes his mind because he cries when he has headaches. Then...
comes Saturday, Grandma's Bday and our family celebration of Chinese New Year. But before the party begins we start the morning with eating dim sum with just the typical 5 of us :) We follow our plans and end up getting pictures for Grandma's bday gift and picking up the cake. While waiting around until everyone came to the house my sister and cousin try to get everything ready, while I lay around crying about stuff that can't be mentioned. Well technically no tears, but yes, I felt like crying. My brother entertains himself with Guitar Hero, and then I battled him out :) Everyone ends up karaoking and once again we were starving. Food finally comes and we celebrate with Grandma :)
Chris comes super late, but just in time for the cake, and the good part, red envelopes. We sing, take pictures, play Texas Holdem, I snack on Trial Mix at 12:00 a.m. they continue to play Texas while I watch. I take a shower at 1:30 a.m. go downstairs to read and watch them play more Texas. What a long night, sad that I work the next morning.
Work was a rush. Not a fun morning at all. One word, Frustrating. Got off work, Chris did not pick me up >=( so I was going to go home the way I got to work, WALK. But I realized I bought drinks, so my cousin came to pick me up. Chris WAS going to treat us to Tastey Garden, but then he only bought my HK pancakes, bad boy.
The guys left for their own family thing, and we stayed at Grandma's and played a little bit of Texas. Guitar Hero wasn't working that well so we gave up on it. We had a craving for Boba Express, but when we got there it was closed. Not a surprise since it was Chinese New Year's Eve. Rushed home to shower before we head to Downtown to watch fireworks. Plus we couldn't shower after 12, and yes we ended up coming home at 1:30ish. I did not want to fall asleep, because the next morning school, and my family would be gone when I came back from school :(
So yup, here I am, being Depressed about how quiet it always ends up at my house when they leave, it sucks.
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| CHIPOTLE has become my new lover <3
I'm a sucker for VS ...honestly..some things are too cute
I am in serious need of money management therapy
and
EBAY has become number 1 on my hate list >=(
For some reason..my deadly cough is gone..but my voice is also kinda gone by the end of the day.
yah! for a four day weekend :)
Green Tea is officially dominating my Life :)
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